This past week has been so hard for me. Everything has been a yoyo. One minute im happy and everything is good and the next minute im beside myself because i want to come home.
I have been calling home for about 2 hours or more everyday and spend about $100 on fone credit this week.
I have been crying and crying so much, and i have been talking to my Dad so much as well and he has helped heaps.
I have been feeling worthlessness and doubt and pain. I have been so angry at myself and i have been emotionally eating when i know i shouldnt be.
On wednesday my boss sent me home early because i was so exhausted then i started crying heaps.
Hes been so helpful and understanding this week, and i feel like im over the mountain and now it seems so small.
I dont know if u know that song but its by Carrie Underwood. It seems like a mountain but once u get over it its but a grain of sand.
On Monday i went to the hot springs with my Boss and it was really beautiful and warm and relaxing.
And Matt told me that my life will be like a candle and it will almost go out and then suddenly it will light back up again from the wind. And thats exactly what is happening and when i remembered what he had told me that brang me peace
I know that things will still be challenging but im getting there slowly.
:)
Friday, July 30, 2010
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Things are going well here,
each day is challenging in its own way, and sometimes i feel so much despair and i just push into God and he helps me overcome the pain that i sometimes feel.
Some days i feel lonely, some days i feel like i cant and dont want to get out of bed. Bt i make myself get up and go for a run or clean the house.
Doing things that are productive are helpful, help me realise how thankful i am for what God is doing through me and in me.
God told me he would provide and he did, hes brought me people who would go out of their way to make sure that im okay and provided for. I have some friends. Not close friends but people i can talk to.
People i meet tell me how beautiful i am and how beautiful my smile is. They tell me how sweet I am and that im like an angel coming into their lives. I know its cheesy but its happening. God is using me wherever i go.
I am learning to look after myself so well, manage money, eat properly and exercise because its just me all by myself. And no one can do things here for me (even though they do)
But it helps because i can call my family all the time. The past few days i have been talking to them so much about2-3 hours a day.
And the BEST THING EVER! My dad is back in New Zealand and I want to have a good relationship with him. I am so happy and thank God so much.
I miss him so much though and i know Michaela has an opportunity to get to know him well and i dont just yet. But i love him so much. And im so glad that i get this chance of making things rite. You dont know how happy i am.
My boss is amazing always doing things for me and looking after me as well as Jan.
I miss home so much, and everyday i think about coming home.
But im gonna hang in there until God speaks and wat my next move is.
I miss everyone like crazy, and i dont know if people have forgotten me because it seems like it. I have been contacting people and they havent even replied and it hurts.
Well atleast i know who my real friends are now.
Bye Bye
each day is challenging in its own way, and sometimes i feel so much despair and i just push into God and he helps me overcome the pain that i sometimes feel.
Some days i feel lonely, some days i feel like i cant and dont want to get out of bed. Bt i make myself get up and go for a run or clean the house.
Doing things that are productive are helpful, help me realise how thankful i am for what God is doing through me and in me.
God told me he would provide and he did, hes brought me people who would go out of their way to make sure that im okay and provided for. I have some friends. Not close friends but people i can talk to.
People i meet tell me how beautiful i am and how beautiful my smile is. They tell me how sweet I am and that im like an angel coming into their lives. I know its cheesy but its happening. God is using me wherever i go.
I am learning to look after myself so well, manage money, eat properly and exercise because its just me all by myself. And no one can do things here for me (even though they do)
But it helps because i can call my family all the time. The past few days i have been talking to them so much about2-3 hours a day.
And the BEST THING EVER! My dad is back in New Zealand and I want to have a good relationship with him. I am so happy and thank God so much.
I miss him so much though and i know Michaela has an opportunity to get to know him well and i dont just yet. But i love him so much. And im so glad that i get this chance of making things rite. You dont know how happy i am.
My boss is amazing always doing things for me and looking after me as well as Jan.
I miss home so much, and everyday i think about coming home.
But im gonna hang in there until God speaks and wat my next move is.
I miss everyone like crazy, and i dont know if people have forgotten me because it seems like it. I have been contacting people and they havent even replied and it hurts.
Well atleast i know who my real friends are now.
Bye Bye
Friday, July 16, 2010
Week 3
Things have been good lately, I have been praying heaps, reading my bible heaps and have felt like i have almost been able to touch God.
Its been intense, but I cant say that things have been (easy). Because i have struggled waking up and felt senses of loneliness and pain.
Although i live with the most amazing people and i have made heaps of friends here, I am starting to miss home heaps.
Starting to miss all the friendships i had back home and one that i think i may have wrecked which is hurtful.
I have applied for so many jobs it isnt funny and although things were hard i just had to keep on going. Making the most of every opportunity and making sure that I am trying and trusting that God would provide.
I have talked to so many people, but are finding it difficult to make friends here. I have made too many acquaintances because I talk to everyone wherever I go. But not really anyone i can be honest with and for someone to cry on when things are hard. I have met a nice guy and he has been a good friend but i need some girl support and I just think thats something that i need to pray and ask God about.
Yesterday I was on my last amount of money, I did some work for Jan and she gave me some. So that will get me through until I get paid from this Job.
Im finding things a bit difficult at times, im finding things challenging and dont know how to deal with things. I know the enemy is attacking me and that things are going to be hard for me obviously because of what God is doing in me. But i need to take my eyes off myself and look at the bigger picture. I also sometimes need to be a little easier on myself because I tend to punish myself when things go bad.
But i will go and see a psychotherapist when I get money and really deal with the deep down issues that i have seemed to have chucked to the side.
Things are good though, I am getting there, God is guiding me loving me and looking after me.
I now have a part time job working at a restaurant at nights, now all i need to do is find a day time job.
But I miss all of you so much, and i dont even know if people are still reading this or not.
I cried tonite because i miss home so much. But I know im here for a reason.
Last nite was the first nite i slept in a couple of nites because i have been stressing too much about money.
I admit, I am weak and im finding things are but in my weakness i will find my strength in God.
My hope will be renewed.
Tomorrow is a new day and i know that things will be stronger, i need to pray more, trust more and be more open for relationships with people and let them into my world.
I have been learning so much about God and so much about the bible and I will share it tomorrow.
Be brave, be strong and keep loving.
Because when all else fails love will find a way.
Love you all and miss you xoxo
Its been intense, but I cant say that things have been (easy). Because i have struggled waking up and felt senses of loneliness and pain.
Although i live with the most amazing people and i have made heaps of friends here, I am starting to miss home heaps.
Starting to miss all the friendships i had back home and one that i think i may have wrecked which is hurtful.
I have applied for so many jobs it isnt funny and although things were hard i just had to keep on going. Making the most of every opportunity and making sure that I am trying and trusting that God would provide.
I have talked to so many people, but are finding it difficult to make friends here. I have made too many acquaintances because I talk to everyone wherever I go. But not really anyone i can be honest with and for someone to cry on when things are hard. I have met a nice guy and he has been a good friend but i need some girl support and I just think thats something that i need to pray and ask God about.
Yesterday I was on my last amount of money, I did some work for Jan and she gave me some. So that will get me through until I get paid from this Job.
Im finding things a bit difficult at times, im finding things challenging and dont know how to deal with things. I know the enemy is attacking me and that things are going to be hard for me obviously because of what God is doing in me. But i need to take my eyes off myself and look at the bigger picture. I also sometimes need to be a little easier on myself because I tend to punish myself when things go bad.
But i will go and see a psychotherapist when I get money and really deal with the deep down issues that i have seemed to have chucked to the side.
Things are good though, I am getting there, God is guiding me loving me and looking after me.
I now have a part time job working at a restaurant at nights, now all i need to do is find a day time job.
But I miss all of you so much, and i dont even know if people are still reading this or not.
I cried tonite because i miss home so much. But I know im here for a reason.
Last nite was the first nite i slept in a couple of nites because i have been stressing too much about money.
I admit, I am weak and im finding things are but in my weakness i will find my strength in God.
My hope will be renewed.
Tomorrow is a new day and i know that things will be stronger, i need to pray more, trust more and be more open for relationships with people and let them into my world.
I have been learning so much about God and so much about the bible and I will share it tomorrow.
Be brave, be strong and keep loving.
Because when all else fails love will find a way.
Love you all and miss you xoxo
Monday, July 5, 2010
Tuesday,
Today, I have come to a conclusion that in reality I have not much money at all left.
But God is higher, and he has given me a revelation that I dont need food or money all I need is him.
I have realised that I take food for granted and I take the life I have for granted. And I am in a time now where its all God. I cant take control of anything, I can apply for jobs and pray and pray and pray. But that will be in Gods timing.
My faith has grown so strong over the past 2 weeks. I have experienced so much that some people wouldnt even experience in their whole lifetime.
I have learnt the meaning of trust, and where to put my hope when things are hard and difficult.
The fact that God is higher than anything and everything that does happen, happens for a reason.
I have begun to understand myself and how I react and respond to certain situations. For example I will avoid 'CONFRONTATION' because I dont want to offend someone or get them angry.
Wherever I go I am talking to people and meeting new people. Heaps of people say that I would be a great motivational speaker or pastor. But it all depends on what God has for me.
I still cnt believe how hurt this place is, but i'm happy because I have found my home church and i have made lots of nice friends :)
And also i was shocked at how real they are which is something that is really on my heart.
Last week I went to a connect group, it was amazing. The people there were just incredible, and i was so blessed to have met them.
We all prayed and this girl shared her testimony and it was amazing how much love the group had towards her I just couldnt believe it.
i met this guy called Michael and we talked for a while. He is really nice and is starting up a buisness to help people and he asked me if i want to be involved. I said ' im really interested' Jumping up and down haha like i do...
And then yaaa....
It was awesome, this lovely lady dropped me and Rosel home. And we chatted and stuff.
On Friday I went to this interview at 5am, pretty crazy... But I met this lady and she was lovely, so nice. She said 'Wow.. we get on so well! do u think we met in our past lives??' and im like um.... im not sure..
So i didnt really understand, but i gave her the chance to explain to me what she believes in. She was talking about her angels and her guides. And Energy and other things like that. It was interesting and I prayed and asked God about it and he said stay away. So thats okay, have to follow Gods way not anyone elses way. She opened up to me about her child hood. And man she was so hurt I couldnt even believe it. She was happy and bubbly but the pain and grief i could see in her was really sad. Yet, there was nothing I could do apart from pray for her and be a friend. I couldve judged what she said to me and walked off, but no I didnt. Because God is bigger than any circumstance or situation. And I know that some way or another he will do something from this situation.
But, you see if I did walk away.. why would I?
judging? fearful of what would happen that I wouldnt have control over?
But hold on a second my life isnt mine, and it says in the bible that if you hold on to your life you will loose it but if you let it go you will find me.
So I let it all go and said okay God, i will sit here and listen to this girl but help me. Help me to not judge, understand and love her. She may be different and have another faith, but I can still be her friend and be Gods light and shine ever so brightly. I just need to pray for strength so i can stick up for God bt in a calm and gentle way.
On the way home from church on Sunday night I met this guy on the Bus.. (Have to take every opportunity i can get to show them some of Gods love)
So i talked to him and picked up tht he was a little handicap, and so i chatted and asked him what he does and where he works. And he told me and he really loved talking to me.
Its amazing, because love always finds a way and if you do everything in love then you will be able to communicate with people and touch peoples lives.
The power of love shouldnt be limited. The power of generosity, kindness, peace, patience, and understanding and listening go beyond all measures.
Yesterday I was reading Corinthians and it says in there that we have 1 mouth and 2 ears so we should do twice as much listening as to opposed to talking.
And i just feel that so many people are urging to talk but they dont know how to, are afraid or nobody approaches them. But once you do approach them then they want to share with you their heart, dreams and there past. Most of the time they want to talk to someone who will just listen without saying anything or judging them.
Man im so pumped and God is so good! And im looking forward to miracles I will be writing on here in about a weeks time.
Hope you are all well! missing you so much, and love you all so much!
xxooox
But God is higher, and he has given me a revelation that I dont need food or money all I need is him.
I have realised that I take food for granted and I take the life I have for granted. And I am in a time now where its all God. I cant take control of anything, I can apply for jobs and pray and pray and pray. But that will be in Gods timing.
My faith has grown so strong over the past 2 weeks. I have experienced so much that some people wouldnt even experience in their whole lifetime.
I have learnt the meaning of trust, and where to put my hope when things are hard and difficult.
The fact that God is higher than anything and everything that does happen, happens for a reason.
I have begun to understand myself and how I react and respond to certain situations. For example I will avoid 'CONFRONTATION' because I dont want to offend someone or get them angry.
Wherever I go I am talking to people and meeting new people. Heaps of people say that I would be a great motivational speaker or pastor. But it all depends on what God has for me.
I still cnt believe how hurt this place is, but i'm happy because I have found my home church and i have made lots of nice friends :)
And also i was shocked at how real they are which is something that is really on my heart.
Last week I went to a connect group, it was amazing. The people there were just incredible, and i was so blessed to have met them.
We all prayed and this girl shared her testimony and it was amazing how much love the group had towards her I just couldnt believe it.
i met this guy called Michael and we talked for a while. He is really nice and is starting up a buisness to help people and he asked me if i want to be involved. I said ' im really interested' Jumping up and down haha like i do...
And then yaaa....
It was awesome, this lovely lady dropped me and Rosel home. And we chatted and stuff.
On Friday I went to this interview at 5am, pretty crazy... But I met this lady and she was lovely, so nice. She said 'Wow.. we get on so well! do u think we met in our past lives??' and im like um.... im not sure..
So i didnt really understand, but i gave her the chance to explain to me what she believes in. She was talking about her angels and her guides. And Energy and other things like that. It was interesting and I prayed and asked God about it and he said stay away. So thats okay, have to follow Gods way not anyone elses way. She opened up to me about her child hood. And man she was so hurt I couldnt even believe it. She was happy and bubbly but the pain and grief i could see in her was really sad. Yet, there was nothing I could do apart from pray for her and be a friend. I couldve judged what she said to me and walked off, but no I didnt. Because God is bigger than any circumstance or situation. And I know that some way or another he will do something from this situation.
But, you see if I did walk away.. why would I?
judging? fearful of what would happen that I wouldnt have control over?
But hold on a second my life isnt mine, and it says in the bible that if you hold on to your life you will loose it but if you let it go you will find me.
So I let it all go and said okay God, i will sit here and listen to this girl but help me. Help me to not judge, understand and love her. She may be different and have another faith, but I can still be her friend and be Gods light and shine ever so brightly. I just need to pray for strength so i can stick up for God bt in a calm and gentle way.
On the way home from church on Sunday night I met this guy on the Bus.. (Have to take every opportunity i can get to show them some of Gods love)
So i talked to him and picked up tht he was a little handicap, and so i chatted and asked him what he does and where he works. And he told me and he really loved talking to me.
Its amazing, because love always finds a way and if you do everything in love then you will be able to communicate with people and touch peoples lives.
The power of love shouldnt be limited. The power of generosity, kindness, peace, patience, and understanding and listening go beyond all measures.
Yesterday I was reading Corinthians and it says in there that we have 1 mouth and 2 ears so we should do twice as much listening as to opposed to talking.
And i just feel that so many people are urging to talk but they dont know how to, are afraid or nobody approaches them. But once you do approach them then they want to share with you their heart, dreams and there past. Most of the time they want to talk to someone who will just listen without saying anything or judging them.
Man im so pumped and God is so good! And im looking forward to miracles I will be writing on here in about a weeks time.
Hope you are all well! missing you so much, and love you all so much!
xxooox
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
1 week since arrival
Okay, i have now been here for about a week now,
i just quit my job this morning and im going to be looking for another one today,
it was good and fun but nothing i will be good at and be able to succeed in.
I love my home, i love it so much
My family is amazing and i cant explain how blessed i am.
Jan comes and picks me up from the station every nite and yesterday i left my fone at work and she was there waiting when i got in from the station. I have honestly never felt so loved. And its not a burden for her, she wants to do it. And she actually went out and brought me some wool to nit. Because i told her i wnt to nit. And she also said if i want to buy a coat i can and i can just take it off my rent. I cant believe it!!! Shes so nice, and when i come home late, she puts my dinner in the warmer and so its still nice when i get home. She is so special and shes so lovely.
Jan also told me that if i dont find a job soon, i will have 6 weeks work anyway, so i dont have to worry. :D
So Gods working everything out perfectly.
And believe this, On the news the other nite it said that ringwood has the dogiest public transport.
Okay, so there is a reason why i am in this PARTICULAR place then!!!!
You know God does everything for a reason and if you look close enough at events and things going on in your life you may just see a puzzle coming together.
For example... this happened rite? oh... so that actually relates to this and means that?
you see..
and most of the time God shows you things but you jst have to identify the key parts and put them together.
Sometimes things are foggy and you cant see in the distance, but if you hang in there, trust God everything will turn out how its planned to turn out. And if its ment to be, god will make it happen.
I have come to realise something, if you do something big and take a step of faith. You wont be able to do it without Gods help. And see him intervene.
Because doing something so big, that you actually wouldnt be able to do in your own strength and going through with it actually shows people around you how much faith you have and how much you trust God.
Which ultimately shows people Gods power.
I went to planetshakers on Sunday nite, it was good but i was late because i got lost. haha..
I left at 3 pm rite? and the service doesnt start till 5pm. So i thought, il have plenty of time.
Got to surrey hills where it said it was and guess what? wasnt there.
So i ended up getting directed to this massive place called youth for the mission,
I think its called yamma... dont know exactly. But the complex was massive, couldnt believe it.
Finally saw a human being haha.. and i asked him, do u know where planetshakers is?
and he said, oh no u actually are in the wrong town. And guess what? the head office was located in this area which is chatham.
So we went to a computer and after looking for it for about half an hour we finally found it.
I wrote down the information, and he wants me to go to a nite that they have a youth for the mission. So im really excited!! :)
I then ran to the station to catch the train, when i got there found out that it doesnt come for another 15 mins rite? so i waited and talked to this guy who is actually a kiwi as well.
He was very friendly :)
We got on the train and talked for a bit longer, then i talked to an aboriginal guy. He was quite shy haha.. so it was struggle to get him to talk much but he talked :)
When i got to the city, i was lost and by this time i was exhausted and i was almost late for church. It was getting really dark and i didnt know which tram stop i had to be at because there were so many it was insane. So i thought id ask people, well the public. And i cant believe that most of the people here are actually tourists believe it or not hahaa....
So after about20 mins i found a guard. So i asked him and he directed me. As soon as i got to the stop the 109 tram came, and im like this is not a coinicidence haha..
So i got on the tram and in 5 mins i was at the church.
Couldnt find it, thought i was locked out. But no! kept walking and there it was !! Praise God!!
So now it was about 5:45pm, the service was good, I got in there and cried and cried and cried because it was such a challenge to get to church and honestly by the time i got there i didnt want to go in. But i did and it was good, i worshipped and praised and i prayed. I felt so much better.
But do you know wat this story shows me?
The fact tht things in our life are hard and tiring and if we search hard enough and do what ever we can when we are tired and stressed to find God we will surely find him! With dedication and hard work. And when we get there we need to embrace it,even if we are tired because those are the moments that matter the most. Thats when you will see God for yourself, you will see his power and his love.
After the servie i went to this place like a dairy, called 7 eleven. And i brought 2 chocolate bars. And only ate one. Had to wait 20mins for the tram and it was absolutly freezzinnGGGG!!!!!!
It everntually came, and when i got to the parliament station i saw i homeless man and God told me to ask him if he wants any food. He said thanks but im full. He was freezing!!
And i tlked to him for about half an hour i was so shocked about all the things he had to say.
There are about 4-500 homeless people in melbourne city and the government think that there is no problem! And on top of that pretty much all of them are teenagers! WHy? because they are rebelious wont listen to there parents and there parents cant punish them because you arent aloud to smack your kids. Like i was saying, so many teenagers smoke, drink and would most likely do drugs. Not only that they actually abuse it. They are so rude and arrogant and have no respect for the elderly or anybody in general. Its so hard to see and it hurts so much. And what i have seen in the past 7 days is flippen shocking and disturbing but i do no that i am here for a reason.
And i know God has put on my heart to love people and this state is definately lacking love.Its insane.
And then after talking to this lovely man i said my goodbyes and he said, if you ever need help you know where to find me. I cant believe how nice that was. He also warned me not to come out on friday and saturday nite because it gets crazy. Theres stabbings and everything.
So tht hurt a lot, knowing how much hate there is here.
While i was talking to this man a guy came and asked fro 50c for the fone. So i said yup here u go, and asked him if he was homeless as well. He said that he was. I was like what? how come?
he said that his parents kicked him out because of drugs and he said he was still on them. It was insane. I was tired nd exhausted but not too tired to talk to some kids.
So i finished talking to this man and started walking into the station. I saw that young guy trying to call and asked him if everything is okay. He said tht it was and thanks for helping out. There was about 5 kids. I talked to them nd asked one guy if we was homeless and how old he was. He said yes, ive been out of home for about 1 month and im homeless. Im 16. Im like are u flippen serious?? you are homeless and you are 16. It was even harder to take, things were going from bad to worse. So i said, are u hungry il go and get u something. Do uwant something warm and he said yes. But his other friend needed to go in a hurry so we couldnt get anything. So i ended up buying him some chips.
And i got his number so i can contact him.
But its hard and i dontknow if you guys know my dream. But one day i want to build a massive massive place where the homeless can come and kids and prostitues and druggies and mums who are facing violence. Where they have beds to sleep on and somewhere to stay temporarily. We will shower them with love, and it says in the bible that when all else fails love will find a way. And i can see this happening in this state. I want to show them what it feels like to be accpeted and treated like a million bucks. Help them to make the rite decisions and give them a hand up in there lives so they can find peace and eventually be able to face the battles in there lives.
I believe you need to start at the root and work your way up! And man Gods going to do mircales here I amso flippen excited and pumped! He is so faithful and through him all things are possible. I know that he is lighting my path and has favour upon me, but i now know how corrupt the world is and how much it needs Jesus.
I cant believe how everything is piecing out so perfectly. That has been my dream since i was about 11. And i know that it will happen one day
and i definately can see it happening here.
Its amazing how God works and how everything goes good for those who love the Lord.
My life is incredible, everything is amazing! Everything is turning out so well
I cant wait to start writing again and share with you my heart.
Thanks hope this inspires you! Because God is amazing and a miracle working God and i wouldnt be here without him.
Love Maree
i just quit my job this morning and im going to be looking for another one today,
it was good and fun but nothing i will be good at and be able to succeed in.
I love my home, i love it so much
My family is amazing and i cant explain how blessed i am.
Jan comes and picks me up from the station every nite and yesterday i left my fone at work and she was there waiting when i got in from the station. I have honestly never felt so loved. And its not a burden for her, she wants to do it. And she actually went out and brought me some wool to nit. Because i told her i wnt to nit. And she also said if i want to buy a coat i can and i can just take it off my rent. I cant believe it!!! Shes so nice, and when i come home late, she puts my dinner in the warmer and so its still nice when i get home. She is so special and shes so lovely.
Jan also told me that if i dont find a job soon, i will have 6 weeks work anyway, so i dont have to worry. :D
So Gods working everything out perfectly.
And believe this, On the news the other nite it said that ringwood has the dogiest public transport.
Okay, so there is a reason why i am in this PARTICULAR place then!!!!
You know God does everything for a reason and if you look close enough at events and things going on in your life you may just see a puzzle coming together.
For example... this happened rite? oh... so that actually relates to this and means that?
you see..
and most of the time God shows you things but you jst have to identify the key parts and put them together.
Sometimes things are foggy and you cant see in the distance, but if you hang in there, trust God everything will turn out how its planned to turn out. And if its ment to be, god will make it happen.
I have come to realise something, if you do something big and take a step of faith. You wont be able to do it without Gods help. And see him intervene.
Because doing something so big, that you actually wouldnt be able to do in your own strength and going through with it actually shows people around you how much faith you have and how much you trust God.
Which ultimately shows people Gods power.
I went to planetshakers on Sunday nite, it was good but i was late because i got lost. haha..
I left at 3 pm rite? and the service doesnt start till 5pm. So i thought, il have plenty of time.
Got to surrey hills where it said it was and guess what? wasnt there.
So i ended up getting directed to this massive place called youth for the mission,
I think its called yamma... dont know exactly. But the complex was massive, couldnt believe it.
Finally saw a human being haha.. and i asked him, do u know where planetshakers is?
and he said, oh no u actually are in the wrong town. And guess what? the head office was located in this area which is chatham.
So we went to a computer and after looking for it for about half an hour we finally found it.
I wrote down the information, and he wants me to go to a nite that they have a youth for the mission. So im really excited!! :)
I then ran to the station to catch the train, when i got there found out that it doesnt come for another 15 mins rite? so i waited and talked to this guy who is actually a kiwi as well.
He was very friendly :)
We got on the train and talked for a bit longer, then i talked to an aboriginal guy. He was quite shy haha.. so it was struggle to get him to talk much but he talked :)
When i got to the city, i was lost and by this time i was exhausted and i was almost late for church. It was getting really dark and i didnt know which tram stop i had to be at because there were so many it was insane. So i thought id ask people, well the public. And i cant believe that most of the people here are actually tourists believe it or not hahaa....
So after about20 mins i found a guard. So i asked him and he directed me. As soon as i got to the stop the 109 tram came, and im like this is not a coinicidence haha..
So i got on the tram and in 5 mins i was at the church.
Couldnt find it, thought i was locked out. But no! kept walking and there it was !! Praise God!!
So now it was about 5:45pm, the service was good, I got in there and cried and cried and cried because it was such a challenge to get to church and honestly by the time i got there i didnt want to go in. But i did and it was good, i worshipped and praised and i prayed. I felt so much better.
But do you know wat this story shows me?
The fact tht things in our life are hard and tiring and if we search hard enough and do what ever we can when we are tired and stressed to find God we will surely find him! With dedication and hard work. And when we get there we need to embrace it,even if we are tired because those are the moments that matter the most. Thats when you will see God for yourself, you will see his power and his love.
After the servie i went to this place like a dairy, called 7 eleven. And i brought 2 chocolate bars. And only ate one. Had to wait 20mins for the tram and it was absolutly freezzinnGGGG!!!!!!
It everntually came, and when i got to the parliament station i saw i homeless man and God told me to ask him if he wants any food. He said thanks but im full. He was freezing!!
And i tlked to him for about half an hour i was so shocked about all the things he had to say.
There are about 4-500 homeless people in melbourne city and the government think that there is no problem! And on top of that pretty much all of them are teenagers! WHy? because they are rebelious wont listen to there parents and there parents cant punish them because you arent aloud to smack your kids. Like i was saying, so many teenagers smoke, drink and would most likely do drugs. Not only that they actually abuse it. They are so rude and arrogant and have no respect for the elderly or anybody in general. Its so hard to see and it hurts so much. And what i have seen in the past 7 days is flippen shocking and disturbing but i do no that i am here for a reason.
And i know God has put on my heart to love people and this state is definately lacking love.Its insane.
And then after talking to this lovely man i said my goodbyes and he said, if you ever need help you know where to find me. I cant believe how nice that was. He also warned me not to come out on friday and saturday nite because it gets crazy. Theres stabbings and everything.
So tht hurt a lot, knowing how much hate there is here.
While i was talking to this man a guy came and asked fro 50c for the fone. So i said yup here u go, and asked him if he was homeless as well. He said that he was. I was like what? how come?
he said that his parents kicked him out because of drugs and he said he was still on them. It was insane. I was tired nd exhausted but not too tired to talk to some kids.
So i finished talking to this man and started walking into the station. I saw that young guy trying to call and asked him if everything is okay. He said tht it was and thanks for helping out. There was about 5 kids. I talked to them nd asked one guy if we was homeless and how old he was. He said yes, ive been out of home for about 1 month and im homeless. Im 16. Im like are u flippen serious?? you are homeless and you are 16. It was even harder to take, things were going from bad to worse. So i said, are u hungry il go and get u something. Do uwant something warm and he said yes. But his other friend needed to go in a hurry so we couldnt get anything. So i ended up buying him some chips.
And i got his number so i can contact him.
But its hard and i dontknow if you guys know my dream. But one day i want to build a massive massive place where the homeless can come and kids and prostitues and druggies and mums who are facing violence. Where they have beds to sleep on and somewhere to stay temporarily. We will shower them with love, and it says in the bible that when all else fails love will find a way. And i can see this happening in this state. I want to show them what it feels like to be accpeted and treated like a million bucks. Help them to make the rite decisions and give them a hand up in there lives so they can find peace and eventually be able to face the battles in there lives.
I believe you need to start at the root and work your way up! And man Gods going to do mircales here I amso flippen excited and pumped! He is so faithful and through him all things are possible. I know that he is lighting my path and has favour upon me, but i now know how corrupt the world is and how much it needs Jesus.
I cant believe how everything is piecing out so perfectly. That has been my dream since i was about 11. And i know that it will happen one day
and i definately can see it happening here.
Its amazing how God works and how everything goes good for those who love the Lord.
My life is incredible, everything is amazing! Everything is turning out so well
I cant wait to start writing again and share with you my heart.
Thanks hope this inspires you! Because God is amazing and a miracle working God and i wouldnt be here without him.
Love Maree
Friday, June 25, 2010
Arrived in Melbourne
I arrived here about 2 days ago.
On Tuesday night i got about 1 hour sleep, it was a little hard as the next day i was pretty exhausted. But, i wanted to make sure that everything was done before i left. So me mum and josh got to the airport at about 5:00 and check in was at about 6:am. But i was way early, its so cool you can check in at a computer now i was like.. and this is all you do and now i can go hahaha..
We then went and had something from mc donalds and that was nice. Before i new it mum needed to go and so me and josh went on the vibrating chairs. Trust me it wasnt easy to get him to do it.. hes like awww this is so embarrassing hahha... and im like do it!
And it was honestly the strangest feeling in the world :)
But then Josh had to go so i gave them both a hug and then i walked upstairs where i filled out my forms to board the plane.
I talked to this lovely man, he has just started reading a book called the shack.
Hes reading it because his father and law just passed away and he wanted him to read it. And i let him know that its an amazing book!
We chatted for a bit, and i finally got my form right after filling it out like 5 times hahaha..
I went through the gates and looked at all the beautiful places... oh the joy of having money.
But not being able to spend it haha :)
I sat down for a while and then before i new it i had to board.
So off i went, entered the plane and i got to have a window seat! YAY!!
hahaha...
it was so awesome.
So i looked over the whole of auckland it was so beautiful! :)
When we got into the air properly it was so beautiful, it was sunny the whole flight, and i loved the fact that the clouds looked like massive bundles of cotton wool, hehe
i just wanted to grab it and brake the window open hahah..
There were so many movies i could watch but i couldnt really get into it, all i wanted to do was look at the clouds haha.. i eventually went to sleep for about an hour, which was lovely.
Before i no it we landed and i couldnt believe how much land there was that we flew over it was insane!
It took forever to get out of the airport , and its so small with like nothing there at all haha...
and the escalater had broken and i was hungry so i couldnt get upstairs, but they finally worked it :)
went up and it was all so expensive so i came bck down, brought a sim card and txted jan and told her that i had arrived.
I then decided to walk over to the bus bay and i caught a sky bus. I sat next to this lovely man that helped me to get on the right train, (i cant believe how friendly people are and how much they want to help me!! its insane!)
I then caught a train from the city to place called ringwood where im stayin. And the name of the train was called lilydale and im like lol, thats a cute as name for a town! :D
I met this guy and his name is Tom, he was so friendly it was awesome.
It took about an hour to get back from the city. When i got their Jan was there waiting to pick me up.
It was amazing!
I then got home at about 1pm. I went to the main shopping centre in my home town and its massive. Its called eastland, i must say i got lost yesterday hhahh... was so funny!!
But hve been getting quite lost in general which has been hillarious.!!
but everybody helps me so its all good!
havent felt lonely at all and made my first friends today at this place im going to be working at called the vox company. They work for Victoria electricity and they offer cheap as rates for electricity and gas so it was awesome. the culture there very party party, very social and chatty, fun and awesome loved it!
everyone is so friendly and i met a guy that comes from new zealand and he moved over here 4 dys ago hillarious ay?
from west auckland.
But had heaps of training yesterday nd t0day so im all sussed.
Passed my so called 'exams' haha
but there is a drinks nite tomoroo but dont think il go.
My boss is real relaxed and pretty much a pretty boy who gets all the girls, but he is awesome. He knows im christian and i tld him im a goody good and he said thats good i admire u for that. And im like thanks \:)
Any way the pay is $18 dollars an hour including tax plus comission.
So fingers crossed i can do well.
Been fun travelling to the city and back, getting lost, meeting people and having animals for the first time in agees. But i will post tomorrow and let you know more. we are having a movie nite at my house and gonna go join them! thanks for reading!
Love you all xox
(so tired hahahah)
On Tuesday night i got about 1 hour sleep, it was a little hard as the next day i was pretty exhausted. But, i wanted to make sure that everything was done before i left. So me mum and josh got to the airport at about 5:00 and check in was at about 6:am. But i was way early, its so cool you can check in at a computer now i was like.. and this is all you do and now i can go hahaha..
We then went and had something from mc donalds and that was nice. Before i new it mum needed to go and so me and josh went on the vibrating chairs. Trust me it wasnt easy to get him to do it.. hes like awww this is so embarrassing hahha... and im like do it!
And it was honestly the strangest feeling in the world :)
But then Josh had to go so i gave them both a hug and then i walked upstairs where i filled out my forms to board the plane.
I talked to this lovely man, he has just started reading a book called the shack.
Hes reading it because his father and law just passed away and he wanted him to read it. And i let him know that its an amazing book!
We chatted for a bit, and i finally got my form right after filling it out like 5 times hahaha..
I went through the gates and looked at all the beautiful places... oh the joy of having money.
But not being able to spend it haha :)
I sat down for a while and then before i new it i had to board.
So off i went, entered the plane and i got to have a window seat! YAY!!
hahaha...
it was so awesome.
So i looked over the whole of auckland it was so beautiful! :)
When we got into the air properly it was so beautiful, it was sunny the whole flight, and i loved the fact that the clouds looked like massive bundles of cotton wool, hehe
i just wanted to grab it and brake the window open hahah..
There were so many movies i could watch but i couldnt really get into it, all i wanted to do was look at the clouds haha.. i eventually went to sleep for about an hour, which was lovely.
Before i no it we landed and i couldnt believe how much land there was that we flew over it was insane!
It took forever to get out of the airport , and its so small with like nothing there at all haha...
and the escalater had broken and i was hungry so i couldnt get upstairs, but they finally worked it :)
went up and it was all so expensive so i came bck down, brought a sim card and txted jan and told her that i had arrived.
I then decided to walk over to the bus bay and i caught a sky bus. I sat next to this lovely man that helped me to get on the right train, (i cant believe how friendly people are and how much they want to help me!! its insane!)
I then caught a train from the city to place called ringwood where im stayin. And the name of the train was called lilydale and im like lol, thats a cute as name for a town! :D
I met this guy and his name is Tom, he was so friendly it was awesome.
It took about an hour to get back from the city. When i got their Jan was there waiting to pick me up.
It was amazing!
I then got home at about 1pm. I went to the main shopping centre in my home town and its massive. Its called eastland, i must say i got lost yesterday hhahh... was so funny!!
But hve been getting quite lost in general which has been hillarious.!!
but everybody helps me so its all good!
havent felt lonely at all and made my first friends today at this place im going to be working at called the vox company. They work for Victoria electricity and they offer cheap as rates for electricity and gas so it was awesome. the culture there very party party, very social and chatty, fun and awesome loved it!
everyone is so friendly and i met a guy that comes from new zealand and he moved over here 4 dys ago hillarious ay?
from west auckland.
But had heaps of training yesterday nd t0day so im all sussed.
Passed my so called 'exams' haha
but there is a drinks nite tomoroo but dont think il go.
My boss is real relaxed and pretty much a pretty boy who gets all the girls, but he is awesome. He knows im christian and i tld him im a goody good and he said thats good i admire u for that. And im like thanks \:)
Any way the pay is $18 dollars an hour including tax plus comission.
So fingers crossed i can do well.
Been fun travelling to the city and back, getting lost, meeting people and having animals for the first time in agees. But i will post tomorrow and let you know more. we are having a movie nite at my house and gonna go join them! thanks for reading!
Love you all xox
(so tired hahahah)
Monday, June 21, 2010
MELBOURNE HERE I COME:)
I will be boarding my plane in about 13 or so hours and will be at the airport in about 11 hours.
I am so excited and so pumped about going.
God gave me the dat 5th of June. And when i wasnt able to go on that day he told me, I was disappointed and hurt because I thought if i dont go on that day then it wont work out for me.
But you know what its all in Gods timing, not mine. And ive come to learn that very well.
I can tell you right now that i wasnt ready to go 2 weeks ago, i wasnt mentally or physically right to go. It didnt seem real enough, more like a fairytale yet to come true. I was excited and everything but i hadnt given it to God. I had managed to take this special thing he gave me into my own hands and started making my own decisions instead of doing what God wanted me to do. And that was to trust him COMPLETELY.
And over the past 2 weeks i have realised again it is me and God. And i will only have him, i will feel lonely often but i will push through with his strength, love and support.
And my relationship with God has stepped up. I used to think me, everyone else and God.
But no, God is MY God.
And yesterday God said to me, you are ready and i know you are.
Lead the way and prove my power.
I have started applying for jobs the past 2 days, and i praise God.
I have officially got 5 interviews so far and 1 job that looks like a definite and they think i would be perfect for the job.
The jobs mostly involve talking with people, (which most of you know would not be hard for me, ahahahah. ) A few of them are charity work, talking to people about a product and one of them is farming. Not 100% sure on the other ones though :P
But im thinking, wow God you are so good!
You have transformed my life and you are blessing me! Incredibly i cant even believe it.
I am stunned and shocked that people want me for an interview considering the fact there are so many people applying and i live in New Zealand and i'm moving over.
But i guess the Lord is good and works everything out for those who love him.
I think trust is an important thing, something to hold tight to your heart.
Because trusting God and saying heres my life, i give it to you. Your will be done, not mine.
And trusting that whatever happens God will be there and knowing that he will love me and look after me.
I am so excited and looking forward to hanging out with my amazing friends tonite and spending the last moments with them.
Thanks
Have a fabulous night and i cant wait to share with you what its like in melbourne.
Love you all
:)
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