Week 3

Things have been good lately, I have been praying heaps, reading my bible heaps and have felt like i have almost been able to touch God.
Its been intense, but I cant say that things have been (easy). Because i have struggled waking up and felt senses of loneliness and pain.
Although i live with the most amazing people and i have made heaps of friends here, I am starting to miss home heaps.
Starting to miss all the friendships i had back home and one that i think i may have wrecked which is hurtful.

I have applied for so many jobs it isnt funny and although things were hard i just had to keep on going. Making the most of every opportunity and making sure that I am trying and trusting that God would provide.

I have talked to so many people, but are finding it difficult to make friends here. I have made too many acquaintances because I talk to everyone wherever I go. But not really anyone i can be honest with and for someone to cry on when things are hard. I have met a nice guy and he has been a good friend but i need some girl support and I just think thats something that i need to pray and ask God about.

Yesterday I was on my last amount of money, I did some work for Jan and she gave me some. So that will get me through until I get paid from this Job.

Im finding things a bit difficult at times, im finding things challenging and dont know how to deal with things. I know the enemy is attacking me and that things are going to be hard for me obviously because of what God is doing in me. But i need to take my eyes off myself and look at the bigger picture. I also sometimes need to be a little easier on myself because I tend to punish myself when things go bad.
But i will go and see a psychotherapist when I get money and really deal with the deep down issues that i have seemed to have chucked to the side.

Things are good though, I am getting there, God is guiding me loving me and looking after me.
I now have a part time job working at a restaurant at nights, now all i need to do is find a day time job.

But I miss all of you so much, and i dont even know if people are still reading this or not.
I cried tonite because i miss home so much. But I know im here for a reason.

Last nite was the first nite i slept in a couple of nites because i have been stressing too much about money.

I admit, I am weak and im finding things are but in my weakness i will find my strength in God.
My hope will be renewed.

Tomorrow is a new day and i know that things will be stronger, i need to pray more, trust more and be more open for relationships with people and let them into my world.

I have been learning so much about God and so much about the bible and I will share it tomorrow.

Be brave, be strong and keep loving.
Because when all else fails love will find a way.

Love you all and miss you xoxo